Pizza Party for One

You know all those hokey songs about how One is the Loneliest Number?

Clearly, they didn't have the sole care and responsibility of a 16 month old child every day.

One is not the loneliest number, one is a lovely, quiet, peaceful number. A number that indulges in selfish tendencies and doesn't require me to share my dinner OR the remote control.

Chris works late nights probably twice a week, and on those nights I make things that he either doesn't like so much or can't eat. For example. Last week I made pizza, because I LOVE it but it gives him heart burn. This week, I'm making black beans because he can't eat them without getting all itchy and struggling to breathe.

So here's how it works.

Step 1. Make dinner for your much beloved but somewhat fussy child.
Step 2. While he is eating, you make your pizzas.
Step 3. Run a bath for your adorable but now filthy child.
Step 4. Put pizzas in the oven, put child in the bath.
Step 5. Scrub child amid much protestation. Remind him that cleanliness is next to godliness.
Step 6. Drain tub, dry child, allow him to run around naked while you pull pizzas out of the oven.

Step 7. Diaper, dress and cuddle your child. Prayers, teeth brushing and goodnight kisses are administered.
Step 8. Sigh deeply as you shut the door.
Step 9. Walk over to the TV/DVD player. Select something soothing like North and South. Press play.
Step 10. Make a plate.


Step 11. As the movie begins, bite quietly into perfectly hot and spicy pizza. Enjoy.


Incidentally, the other blessing of these solitary parties is that the Boy and I get to enjoy the leftovers for super easy lunches through the week. Sally forth and enjoy yourself!