The Sun is Comin' Up

Have you ever had one of those conversations that left you feeling filled with hope?  Maybe it wasn't anything consequential, nothing earth-shattering or deep or serious.  Just the act of sitting and talking to another human being, of laughing together and commiserating over shared frustrations and ultimately laughing at how far you've come.

My friend B called me last night.  We talked for almost 2 hours and lo, it was wonderful.

I haven't felt like I could really confide in anyone for a while now and it was so great to just sit and talk and not worry about how everything would be interpreted.  We talked about crafts and Easter and our kids and our husbands and job search frustration.  We talked about service and trying to feed our families healthy foods.  We talked about the logistics of having more than one small child and laughed about our efforts to get by with the hands that we have.  I told her about the Boy's goofiness and how he cracks me up.  We talked about her sister's upcoming wedding and the drama of planning said wedding and I laughed and sighed and was just so GLAD it wasn't me!  We talked about the posters we had up on our walls when we were teenagers and oh man, that was a good laugh.

I'm not sure if it's that I'm finally getting healthy enough to have a good conversation without breaking down into wheezing coughs (I've been sick for 2 weeks, oh how I wish I was exaggerating), or if it's just been too long since I've had a good laugh (January--New Mexico--Samwise...oh that girl can make me laugh so hard I question my bladder), but whatever the reason I went to bed feeling happy and woke up feeling a wonderful sense of hope and peace. 

(If you're curious the Boy is cracking me up.  Yesterday he was rolling a golf ball back and forth across the window sill and cracking himself up.  If there is anything, and I do mean ANYTHING, that he really likes whether it's a toy or his SHOES, he puts it up close to his neck and face and gives it a bone-crushing hug.  It's awesome.  Oh, and at one point I had a wall covered in posters of New Kids on the Block--until I developed my current (fabulous) taste in music.  Yes, it is a bit mortifying, but dude--I was 13.  Is there anything at 13 that ISN'T mortifying?)

I've blogged about it before but it bears with repetition.  I remain pleasantly surprised at the amazing women I meet.  No matter where I go, no matter the town or the geography, there are extraordinary women there.  They are smart and fierce and kind and incredibly funny. 

I went to bed late last night.  I didn't sleep particularly well again.  But I woke up this morning with a sense of light at the end of this long tunnel.  A wonderful feeling of having never really been alone, despite how it felt at times.  A sense that things may still be hard, but there WILL be laughter.

Behold the power of a good conversation.