Jolly Old St. Chris...

on 09 December 2009

In case you didn't get enough Christmas Spirit with Monday's post...

I am married to the cutest Christmas elf EVER.

I'd like to welcome you all to Chris' Festival of Humiliations!  He knew it was coming, he knew when he signed on for this residency that he'd have to dress up as an Elf for Christmas and the Easter Bunny for Easter (and yes, yes, I will be documenting that as well), so don't feel too sorry for him.  If anything, feel sorry that he spent the WHOLE of last weekend at work.  Doing stuff like this.  He was not a happy elf.  In fact, I may even go so far as to say he was an *angry* elf (name that movie!).

But the Boy and I got to join him for this one!  We headed over to the hospital for Cookies with Santa and lo, it was INSANE!

First off, I just sort of assumed that, this being a small town, the whole Cookies with Santa thing would be small as well.  Um.  NO.  I got there about a half hour late and it was a MADHOUSE!  Hundreds of people!  Every chair filled!  Children hopped up on sugar and kool-aid and candy canes!  You couldn't even SEE Santa Clause!  It was MADNESS, I tell you, MADNESS!

We finally made it into Santa's Inner Sanctum, but I used the time in line to send Chris a text message:  "Well, this is just 8 circles of SUCK, isn't it?"


Not terrible.  The Boy was a little freaked out.  I can't say I blame him.  I find the Santa aspect of Christmas a little strange, this old guy who gets his jollies by going around and delivering toys surrepitiously to "good" children while leaving lumps of coal for "bad" children?  I find it fishy.  But that could just be me.

Anyway, I ate the better part of two nasty store-bought sugar cookies because the Boy had grabbed them and I didn't want HIM to eat that much sugar, thankfully I managed to steer us clear of the Red Punch of DEATH.  All in all, it was a successful afternoon...though, not one I'd like to repeat any time soon.  Too many people, too much sugar, far too many sequins for my taste.

I love this kid's Daddy.  I love this kid.  I shall not tell you how much for it would take too long and I have not the words to express it adequately.  Happy, Wednesday, y'all.


C said...

FUN! Now can Chris recite the code of elves?

Annie Atkin Rasmussen said...

You shouldn't DO this to me! I'm sitting here, trying to nurse and almost PEEING MY PANTS trying not to wake up this child laughing!

Karen said...

Sequins and a little bling on the belt. Very nice!

Sibley Saga .... said...

That's hilarious stuff! What a good guy Chris is to put up with that stuff. And I look forward to the Easter pictures.

And if anybody offered me something sugary and store bought I would have asked,

"Does it have sugar in it? Then, YES!"

(Sigh. Quoting Elf is just way too much fun.)

Whimsy said...

Priceless. Simply priceless.

And my husband would have KILLED me if I'd posted this picture. That's a patient man, there.

Molly said...

Arnie and I got a good laugh out of this one!
Chris is such a sport!